


Doctor's Appointment

by miss_pictures



Series: The Doc Is In [1]
Category: DCU (Comics), Harley Quinn (Comics), Poison Ivy (Comics)
Genre: Arkham Asylum, Childhood Memories, Childhood Trauma, Developing Friendships, Developing Relationship, F/F, Memories, Psychologists & Psychiatrists, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, Therapy, Trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-02
Updated: 2020-05-23
Packaged: 2021-03-02 06:20:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 7,137
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23966791
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/miss_pictures/pseuds/miss_pictures
Summary: Pamela Isley has been stuck in Arkham Asylum for her continued crimes that have terrorized the city. Harleen Quinzel is the new psychiatrist at Arkham, brought to help the criminals discuss their issues. Pamela thinks Harleen is going to be like the usual psychiatrists that are brought to Arkham; stay long enough until they get too terrified to show their face again. Harleen proves that she is different and makes Pamela feel emotions she had not felt in years.
Relationships: Pamela Isley/Harleen Quinzel
Series: The Doc Is In [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1727917
Comments: 9
Kudos: 131





	1. Session One (Monday)

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, this is the first fanfic I have ever written before and decided to just give it a shot. It was a long process, but I'm happy with the outcome. Hope you enjoy.

Dr. Quinzel: Hello. I am Dr. Harleen Quinzel. I’ll be your new psychiatrist. 

There was a pause. 

Pamela: So, you’re the fresh meat?

Dr. Quinzel cleared her throat. 

Dr. Quinzel: Is it okay if I tape our sessions?  
Pamela: Do as you please, Doctor.

Dr. Quinzel cleared her throat again.

Dr. Quinzel: Pamela Isley, also known as Poison Ivy. 

She paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: How would you like me to address you?  
Pamela: Dr. Isley is fine. 

Dr. Quinzel hummed. 

Dr. Quinzel: So...Dr. Isley...how have you reacted to psychiatrists in the past?  
Pamela: I’m sure you read my file.  
Dr. Quinzel: But I am asking you.   
Pamela: Something like this.

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: How are you mentally?  
Pamela: Average  
Dr. Quinzel: Physically?

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: Look at me. I’m wilting away.  
Dr. Quinzel: How come?  
Pamela: I need sunlight. My cell has all sealed walls, no windows. I’m relying more on my human side more than ever.  
Dr. Quinzel: Do you often rely on your human side?  
Pamela: It’s always there.   
Dr. Quinzel: That’s not what I asked.   
Pamela: And that’s not something I want to tell. 

Silence filled the room for several minutes. 

Pamela: Anymore questions, doc?

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: Not at the moment. I’ll be back for our next session.


	2. Session Two (Thursday)

Dr. Quinzel: Good morning, Dr. Isley.   
Pamela: I see I haven’t scared you away.   
Dr. Quinzel: It’s going to take a lot more than that.

Pamela chuckled. 

Pamela: Then I must try harder. 

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: How are you today?  
Pamela: Just peachy. 

Dr. Quinzel hummed. 

Pamela: What?  
Dr. Quinzel: Nothing. You’re still in a delicate place.   
Pamela: A delicate place?  
Dr. Quinzel: You’re quick to anger, Dr. Isley. I can’t get anything out of you that way.   
Pamela: Exactly.   
Dr. Quinzel: So, I’m not going to waste my time.


	3. Session Three (Monday)

Pamela: Well, well, well, look what the cat dragged in.  
Dr. Quinzel: I see your attitude is in the same place.

Pamela was silent.

Dr. Quinzel: How are you feeling?

Pamela paused.

Pamela: Curious.  
Dr. Quinzel: About?  
Pamela: You.

Silence filled the air.

Pamela: You haven’t gotten anything out of me, yet you continue to come back.  
Dr. Quinzel: I’m not going to give up on you, Dr. Isley.

Pamela paused. Silence filled the room once again.

Dr. Quinzel: Are you okay talking to a psychiatrist?

The silence made a recurrence.

Dr. Quinzel sighed.

Pamela: Wait. 

She paused. 

Pamela: Why do you care so much?

Dr. Quinzel: You’re broken, Doctor. I want to help you. 

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: I’ll see you during our next session.


	4. Session Four (Friday)

Pamela: You’re back.  
Dr. Quinzel: I wanted to give you some time to think.

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: How are you feeling?  
Pamela: Okay.  
Dr. Quinzel: You’re still wilting.  
Pamela: Still no sun.  
Dr. Quinzel: Have you always dealt with this?  
Pamela: This isn’t my first lockup.  
Dr. Quinzel: In your file, it says your professor made you this way.

Pamela scoffed. 

Pamela: The asshole.

Dr. Quinzel paused.

Dr. Quinzel: Tell me about him

Pamela paused.

Pamela: He was a genius. We had great conversations about plant life and how to accelerate plant growth. 

Pamela sighed.

Pamela: He was obsessed.  
Dr. Quinzel: And his obsession got to you?  
Pamela: Next thing I knew I was this.  
Dr. Quinzel: How does it feel to be both plant and human?  
Pamela: I don’t belong. I’m too human for plants and too plant-like for humans.

Dr. Quinzel paused.

Dr. Quinzel: Would you say that you’re lost?  
Pamela: Isolated. Targeted. Shunned almost.

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: You’re the only one of your kind and feel alone. 

Pamela didn’t say anything. 

Dr. Quinzel: Have you ever felt like you belonged?

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: Among my plants, yes. Working with people on the same level among those plants, yes.   
Dr Quinzel: And that was taken from you?  
Pamela: A lot has been taken from me.   
Dr. Quinzel: How does that make you feel?

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: Worthless.   
Dr. Quinzel: Has anyone ever made you feel like you mattered to them?  
Pamela: Not for a long time. My mother made me feel loved when we worked on flowers together. My father killed her. I felt special with my professor. He turned me into this. Every time I try to help the Earth I get persecuted.   
Dr. Quinzel: Have you considered that you’ve gone about it in the wrong way?

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: There’s no other way for them to listen to me. Killing gets their attention.   
Dr. Quinzel: Of course it does, but not the attention you want or need.   
Pamela: But I need to save them and no one else is going to!  
Dr. Quinzel: Doctor…  
Pamela: They don’t care that the plants are dying! They don’t hear their cries every day!

Pamela sniffled. 

Pamela: I need to save them. I have to…and if killing gets me that I’ll keep doing it.   
Dr. Quinzel: And you’ll keep ending up here.

Pamela paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: A simple conversation can go far. I’m sure you know. 

Pamela was silent. 

Dr. Quinzel cleared her throat before sighing. 

Dr. Quinzel: Well, I think that’s enough for today.


	5. Session Five (Wednesday)

Dr. Quinzel: Hello, Doctor. How are you feeling?  
Pamela: Okay.

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: So, I want to talk about your childhood.  
Pamela: You’re in for a treat. 

Dr. Quinzel chuckled. 

Dr. Quinzel: I’m assuming it wasn’t happy.  
Pamela: My father killed my mother for starters.  
Dr. Quinzel: How old were you when it happened?

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: Young. Younger than ten. 

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: He was abusive. He abused my mother and I. The garden was where we escaped. It’s the only place we had away from him, just the two of us.  
Dr. Quinzel: Do you think you’d be different if she was still alive?  
Pamela: A lot of things would be different if she was still here. 

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: If you walked out of here and your mother was out there waiting for you, what would you do?  
Pamela: Get her out of Gotham immediately.  
Dr. Quinzel: Would you continue to do what you’re doing?  
Pamela: I have to.  
Dr. Quinzel: You choose to. 

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: If your mother can leave, why can’t you?

Pamela didn’t say anything. 

Dr. Quinzel: Is it worry? Fear?  
Pamela: I’m not afraid!

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: What’s holding you back? 

Silence filled the room. 

Pamela: The plants. 

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: There’s plants here I need to take care of. Someone needs to watch over them.  
Dr. Quinzel: How are you supposed to help from here? 

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: You can’t.  
Pamela: I’m never here long enough for those repercussions to happen.  
Dr. Quinzel: Don't you want to avoid this all together?  
Pamela: Of course, but to save my plants the way I want, I have to be here. 

Dr. Quinzel hummed. 

Pamela: What?  
Dr. Quinzel: You don’t truly belong with plants but you put them above everything else.  
Pamela: It’s the only place where I have a home. 

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: Have you ever had that in a person?  
Pamela: My mother  
Dr. Quinzel: What made her home like?  
Pamela paused. 

Pamela: I was comfortable around her. She protected me. She made me feel warm inside, like I was the most important thing in her life. I loved her.  
Dr. Quinzel: Do you think you’ll find that in another person?  
Pamela: I could if I wanted to.  
Dr. Quinzel: But you have no desire to?  
Pamela: Correct.  
Dr. Quinzel: How come?  
Pamela: There’s a level of opening up I don’t want to do again.  
Dr. Quinzel: And what if you do find yourself opening up like that again?  
Pamela: Then I’m going to get hurt again. The first time was a warning. The second was fated.  
Dr. Quinzel: Do you feel like you were born to be hurt?  
Pamela: Isn’t everyone?

Dr. Quinzel didn’t say anything. 

Dr. Quinzel: I think that’s enough for today.


	6. Session Six (Monday)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the reads. I plan on updating five chapters every Saturday, until the story is complete. So, it's about two more weeks after this one for the complete story. Hope you all enjoy

Dr. Quinzel: How’s the new space?

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: Lovely.   
Dr. Quinzel: I’m glad to hear it. 

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: Did you do this? 

Dr. Quinzel didn’t say anything. Silence filled the room for several moments. 

Pamela: You do realize that I can fully escape now. Just slip my vines through. 

Dr. Quinzel’s voice hitched in her throat. 

Dr. Quinzel: But you won’t.   
Pamela: How can you be so sure?  
Dr. Quinzel: I trust you.

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: That’s foolish of you.   
Dr. Quinzel: It might be, but I know you.  
Pamela: Do you?  
Dr. Quinzel: I like to think so.  
Pamela: Thinking and knowing are two different things. 

Dr. Quinzel paused. She cleared her throat. 

Dr. Quinzel: What made you want to become a doctor?  
Pamela: Plants are my safe place.  
Dr. Quinzel: Do you feel safe now?

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: Safer.   
Dr. Quinzel: Are they your only safe space?  
Pamela: I’d say so.  
Dr. Quinzel: I guess I’m not working hard enough, if you don’t see me as a safe space. 

Pamela chuckled. 

Pamela: Good luck with getting me to see you that way.  
Dr. Quinzel: It shouldn’t be that hard.

Pamela chuckled once again.

Pamela: Well, we’ll see; won’t we, Doctor?


	7. Session Seven (Monday)

Dr. Quinzel: Morning, Doctor.   
Pamela: Morning.   
Dr. Quinzel: How are you doing today?

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: Fine.  
Dr. Quinzel: How was this week for you?  
Pamela: The usual.  
Dr. Quinzel: Looks like you’ve grown more plants with you.  
Pamela: I’m surprised the guards allowed me to keep them.  
Dr. Quinzel: Do you feel calmer with them around?

Pamela paused.

Pamela: It calms my nerves. I don’t feel like half of me is dying.  
Dr. Quinzel: When you don’t have plants near, do you still hear them calling to you?  
Pamela: Always.   
Dr. Quinzel: Never silent.   
Pamela: I can limit it down to one plant, but since we’re in the city, there’s still cries. They don’t always have the sunlight they need or room to grow. They suffer constantly. They cry out to me for help.  
Dr. Quinzel: And from here you can’t do anything. How does that make you feel?

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: Hopeless. I have to neglect a side of me.   
Dr. Quinzel: Is it better with you being in sunlight now?  
Pamela: Much. It’s easier to suppress, since I’m still locked away in here.  
Dr. Quinzel: How long do you have?  
Pamela: As long as I draw out my escape.

Dr. Quinzel chuckled.

Pamela: Don’t believe me, Doctor?

Dr. Quinzel paused, taking in a deep inhale.

Pamela: We are in Arkham. Breakouts happen all the time.

Dr. Quinzel was silent.

Pamela: Does that scare you...Doctor?

Dr. Quinzel cleared her throat.

Dr. Quinzel: I wouldn’t be here, if I couldn’t handle it.  
Pamela: That was not the question that I asked.

Dr. Quinzel paused.

Pamela: I’ll protect you if you need it.

Pamela chuckled.

Pamela: If you allow me.

Dr. Quinzel was silent. She sighed. 

Dr. Quinzel: I don’t know how to get you back on track when we get here, so I think we should call it a day

Pamela paused.

Pamela: Doctor  
Dr. Quinzel: Yes.

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: Call me Pamela from now on.

Dr. Quinzel: Of course. I’ll see you next week.


	8. Session Eight (Monday)

Pamela: Doctor  
Dr. Quinzel: It’s good to see you, Pamela. How have you been?  
Pamela: Could be better. Could be worse.  
Dr. Quinzel: Sleeping well?  
Pamela: As well as I can.

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: I want to get personal today. Really see what makes you tick and see how your mind works.  
Pamela: Tick away, Doctor.

Dr. Quinzel paused.

Dr. Quinzel: So, you have mentioned that your professor made you the way you are now. Initially, how did you feel after everything that had happened?

Pamela paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: Were changes immediate?

Pamela sighed. 

Pamela: I-I knew something went wrong just by the look on Jason’s face. It didn’t take long for me to see the color of my skin had changed.

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: I couldn’t even understand what was going on before Jason fled.

Dr. Quinzel: Leaving you alone?

Pamela: I had no one but myself. I was still trying to understand it all. I-I nearly died. And where was he? Nowhere to be found.

Dr. Quinzel: What was your relationship before that change?

Pamela paused. 

Pamela:...I thought he loved me, cared about me. 

She paused and sighed.

Pamela: He did, just not in the way I thought or wanted.

Dr. Quinzel: Would you say the love he had for you was like the one your father had for your mother?

Pamela hesitated. 

Pamela: My father was abusive.

Dr. Quinzel: So, was Jason, it seems.

Pamela was silent. 

Dr. Quinzel: Pamela.

Pamela still did not say a word.

Dr. Quinzel: Pamela.

Silence was still prominent in the room.

Dr. Quinzel sighed. 

Dr. Quinzel: I guess that’s enough for you. I’ll see you next week.


	9. Session Nine (Monday)

Dr. Quinzel: It’s good to see you again, Pamela. How are you doing?

Pamela sighed.

Pamela: I’m all right.

Dr. Quinzel: How were you after our last session? Was there anything you wanted to talk about?

Pamela paused.

Pamela: For a while, I had a hard time separating my father from Jason.

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: I didn’t like coming to terms with their abuse and how equal they were. I was a fool just like my mother and stayed with him.  
Dr. Quinzel: It was repeated behavior.  
Pamela: Exactly. Behavior I told myself I would never do to stray away from being my mother.

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: I’m just like her. Scared. Fragile. Constantly not knowing what to do.  
Dr. Quinzel: Is that how you feel now?  
Pamela: In here. I can’t do anything.

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: You mentioned that you could escape here at any time, if that’s the case, how come you haven’t?

Pamela paused.

Dr. Quinzel: What’s the repercussions you’re worried about?

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: There are no repercussions. I could leave here right now, but I stay for you.  
Dr. Quinzel: For me?  
Pamela: I’m giving you a fair shot to analyze me like I have for any other psychiatrist.   
Dr. Quinzel: Is that the only reason?

Pamela paused.

Pamela: I can tell you actually care about me. You moved me into the sunlight. And you haven’t given up on me when I was being...difficult.  
Dr. Quinzel: I wouldn’t be a good psychiatrist, if I left. You have trauma that has been deeply rooted in you, that’s only been growing in adulthood. It’s good to talk about it and analyze how it has made you to be the person you are today. And learn how to let it help you instead of harming you.   
Pamela: You always know the right things to say. Is that the degree or your personality?

Dr. Quinzel chuckled.

Dr. Quinzel: What if I happened to say both?  
Pamela: Well, then I have to break out that personality of yours to really know what’s true.

Dr. Quinzel chuckled again.

Dr. Quinzel: Now who is the patient and who’s the therapist?  
Pamela: You tell me, Doc.


	10. Session Ten (Monday)

Pamela: Doctor  
Dr. Quinzel: Hello, Pamela. How are you?  
Pamela: Better with you near.

Dr. Quinzel chuckled.

Dr. Quinzel: Anything happened in the last week that you want to talk about?  
Pamela: Not much.  
Dr. Quinzel: How are you dealing with the cries from your plants?  
Pamela: They’re manageable. Still painful to experience, but that’s what life is.  
Dr. Quinzel: Painful?  
Pamela: Exactly.

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: Has there been a point in your life when there wasn’t pain?  
Pamela: No.  
Dr. Quinzel: That was quick.   
Pamela: I always have the overwhelming pain of not having my mother and then other pain comes over on top of it.  
Dr. Quinzel: What is your current pain on top of it?  
Pamela: The battle of plant versus human.  
Dr. Quinzel: Why is it plant versus human instead of plant and human?  
Pamela: I mentioned it before. I’m too human to be a plant and too plant-like to be a human.  
Dr. Quinzel: But you, Pamela, are both.

Pamela didn’t say anything.

Dr. Quinzel: Do you feel more of one than the other?  
Pamela: I connect more with my plant side. It’s easier. Less judgement.  
Dr. Quinzel: And you don’t totally connect with them?  
Pamela: As much as I try to disregard it, I am still human.  
Dr. Quinzel: Why do you disregard it?  
Pamela: Look where I am, Doctor. For trying to help my plants, I am here. Man sent me here. They look at me and know I don’t belong with them.  
Dr. Quinzel: You don’t feel accepted.  
Pamela: When I changed I was looked at as a monster. I literally went insane. That insanity drew me further away from my humanity. I started to see how much of a monster I really was.  
Dr. Quinzel: Do you still believe that you are insane?  
Pamela: Does insanity ever really leave, Doctor?

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: I should say, do you believe that you are the same level as insane that you were then?  
Pamela: No.  
Dr. Quinzel: Does it still bother you?

Pamela paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: Be honest.

Pamela: It...sometimes I can’t...I don’t....it’s hard to…  
Dr. Quinzel: Control it?  
Pamela: It sneaks up on me and I lose it at a moment's notice. Sometimes it gets so bad I scare myself. I never know what to do.  
Dr. Quinzel: Would you like to figure out a way to cope with it?   
Pamela: Is there a way?  
Dr. Quinzel: There’s always a way. I just need to figure out what’s best for you and what works for you.

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: When does it happen?  
Pamela: When I get angry.  
Dr. Quinzel: So, your anger triggers your insanity.  
Pamela: I just get so upset over situations, mainly ones I can’t control.  
Dr. Quinzel: You don’t like not having control.  
Pamela: Yes.  
Dr. Quinzel: That wasn’t a question, Pamela. I know you.

Pamela paused.

Dr. Quinzel: What we need to figure out is what can calm you down before you get to the point of insanity and losing it. What would that be? I want to say your plants, but I have a hunch that’s what makes you get to that edge, sometimes.   
Pamela: My plants aren’t the sole cause.   
Dr. Quinzel: Expand on that.

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: I get angry about not doing what I can for my plants. I get angry about being jailed when I just want to save them. Having them around keeps me calm and collected. Taking care of them gives me a sense of being.   
Dr. Quinzel: You’re very caring.   
Pamela: Question or Observation?

Dr. Quinzel chuckled. 

Dr. Quinzel: Either or. Correct me, if I am wrong.  
Pamela: I have to be, to be in the position I am right now.  
Dr. Quinzel: Explain. 

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: Cared about the appearance of a happy family to speak out against my dad. Cared about my plants more than accepting my humanity.  
Dr. Quinzel: Pamela, why do you dehumanize yourself?  
Pamela: Everyone does.  
Dr. Quinzel: I don’t. 

Pamela paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: Despite your plant like half, you, Pamela, are still human.  
Pamela: Then you’re the only one.   
Dr. Quinzel: My goal is to make it at least two and include you with me.

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: Doctor  
Dr. Quinzel: Yes 

Pamela hesitated. 

Dr. Quinzel: Take your time. 

Pamela took a deep inhale. 

Pamela: Is it too much to ask to see you more during the week?

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: You make it all easier. I can talk to you. You get the gears going in my head again. I haven’t been challenged like this in awhile.   
Dr. Quinzel: Of course. Is twice a week okay?  
Pamela: That would be nice.  
Dr. Quinzel: I’ll see you Friday, then, Pamela.


	11. Session Eleven (Friday)

Pamela: Hello, Doctor.   
Dr. Quinzel: Hello, Pamela. How are you?  
Pamela: Okay. And you?

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: I’m doing well, Pamela. Thank you for asking. Anything been on your mind?  
Pamela: You.

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: What exactly about me?  
Pamela: What you said last about me being human.  
Dr. Quinzel: How’s that going? Are you starting to believe it?  
Pamela: I don’t know if I ever will. I can try, though.  
Dr. Quinzel: That’s all I can ask for.

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Pamela: Am I the only one you speak to, Doctor?  
Dr. Quinzel: I have ten other patients here.  
Pamela: Am I your favorite?

Dr. Quinzel chuckled. 

Pamela: Come on. I have to be.

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: I can tell. 

Dr. Quinzel: How?

Pamela: Your pheromones tell me everything. 

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: It’s nice to not have to control them and just see them play out organically. 

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: I-I….  
Pamela: Have you ever dated someone, Doctor?  
Dr. Quinzel: Pamela.  
Pamela: Just this one question.  
Dr. Quinzel: I haven’t.

Pamela hummed. 

Pamela: Interesting.  
Dr. Quinzel: Was Jason your last relationship?  
Pamela: Unfortunately.  
Dr. Quinzel: By choice?  
Pamela: I guess so. By that point people were looking at me like I wasn’t one of them and I slowly separated myself from humanity.  
Dr. Quinzel: Do you think it’d be beneficial for you to have a relationship like that again without the abuse, of course?  
Pamela: I don’t like people.  
Dr. Quinzel: That wasn’t my question. 

Pamela chuckled. 

Pamela: Can’t meet that many people in a jail cell.

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: It would need to be like a partnership. Togetherness, not one trying to get an up over the other.  
Dr. Quinzel: Is that something you would like to have?

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: I would.   
Dr. Quinzel: How do you think that would contribute to your way to recovery?  
Pamela: They might be able to help me with my anger. Talk me down. Give me a voice of reason.  
Dr. Quinzel: So, having a partner is something you want in life, but you don’t like humans. How are you going to get from where you are to where you want to be?

Pamela paused before finally sighing. 

Pamela: I’m going to have to...be more open to human contact.  
Dr. Quinzel: Is that something you’re okay with doing?  
Pamela: I don’t know. So far you’re the only person I like talking to.

Dr. Quinzel laughed. 

Pamela: My problem is with the people that judge me so quickly. I don’t like to change the color of my skin just for convenience, but that’s the first thing people see.   
Dr. Quinzel: What happens when you do change it?  
Pamela: My relationships never go far. I end up coming off condescending, like I know everything.  
Dr. Quinzel: You would need someone on the same level as you then, since I imagine you can’t dumb it down.

Pamela chuckled. 

Pamela: That’s a hard thing to do.  
Dr. Quinzel: I imagine.  
Pamela: You probably never had that problem.   
Dr. Quinzel: I keep to myself mostly. Always throwing myself into my work.

Pamela chuckled. 

Pamela: I remember those days. Always nose deep in a book. 

Dr. Quinzel chuckled. 

Dr. Quinzel: I devote a lot of time to my research, so meeting people on a regular basis doesn't come naturally for me.  
Pamela: I get it. But remember you’re in the outside world and I’m in here. Enjoy it for me.

Dr. Quinzel chuckled.

Dr. Quinzel: I will. I’ll think of you when I’m out.  
Pamela: I hope so.


	12. Session Twelve (Monday)

Pamela: Doctor! Good to see you.

Dr. Quinzel chuckled. 

Dr. Quinzel: Good to see you, too, Pamela. Looks like you’ve grown more flowers.  
Pamela: Yes. I’ve been on my best behavior.

Dr. Quinzel chuckled.

Dr. Quinzel: I’ve heard. I’m proud. You’re doing good, Pamela.  
Pamela: Haven’t heard that in awhile.  
Dr. Quinzel: But it is true. You’ve made a lot of progress. It’s kind of shocking.  
Pamela: How so?  
Dr. Quinzel: Psychiatrist that you had before have not made it as far as I have.  
Pamela: I never had a psychiatrist like you.  
Dr. Quinzel: What makes me different?  
Pamela: You didn’t give up on me. No matter what I said and my attitude towards you, you still wanted to help me.  
Dr. Quinzel: Well of course, you need help. I became a psychiatrist to help people.  
Pamela: There has to be more to the reason why you stayed with me.

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Pamela hesitated for a moment.

Pamela: How are your other patients?  
Dr. Quinzel: Just fine.

Pamela hummed.

Pamela: I’m still your favorite.

Dr. Quinzel chuckled. 

Pamela: How long have you been a psychiatrist?  
Dr. Quinzel: Straight out of college, a few years now.  
Pamela: I was working right out of college, too.  
Dr. Quinzel: Workaholics, the two of us.

Pamela chuckled. 

Pamela: It’s easier than socializing. 

Dr. Quinzel chuckled. 

Pamela: Did you always want to be a psychiatrist?  
Dr. Quinzel: Yes. Seeing the way my parents acted with one another, it made me want to analyze what exactly was going on in people’s minds that made them the way they are.  
Pamela: Is it hard? Dealing with so many problems from other people?  
Dr. Quinzel: Sometimes. It’s hard to figure out what their feelings are and what mine are. And it gets frustrating, because I want to do what’s best for my patients, but it’s not always right there in front of me.  
Pamela: I can be your therapist.

Dr. Quinzel laughed. 

Dr. Quinzel: Our arrangement now is just fine, Pamela.  
Pamela: Is it?

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: What do you mean by that, Pamela?

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: You are my therapist, but also a friend.  
Dr. Quinzel: Pamela.   
Pamela: Probably unconventional, I know, and we won’t have any type of relationship passed what we have now.

Dr. Quinzel was silent.

Pamela: Doctor.  
Dr. Quinzel: Hm?  
Pamela: Being a therapist is the most important thing to you, right?  
Dr. Quinzel: Yes.  
Pamela: And nothing would get in that way?  
Dr. Quinzel: Depends on what it is.  
Pamela: Hypothetically, what if you fell in love?

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: Well, what would you do for love, Doctor?  
Pamela paused.

Pamela: Haven’t quite figured that out yet. Was wondering if you'd give me insight.  
Dr. Quinzel: I never had a relationship prior, so I can only assume I’d fight for it, if I really care about them.  
Pamela: Love always came to me, I never had to fight. That love was probably the wrong type. I’m scared with this one. Anything can happen.

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: Don’t be afraid of love, Pamela.  
Pamela: Could say the same to you, Quinzel.


	13. Session Thirteen (Wednesday)

Pamela: This is unexpected.  
Dr. Quinzel: I know. I’m sorry. I just…

Dr. Quinzel sighed.

Dr. Quinzel: I needed to see you again.  
Pamela: What for?

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: Just because. This doesn’t have to be a therapy session, if you don’t want it to be.

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: Unconventional.   
Dr. Quinzel: I can go, if you want me to. I know this is all unexpected.  
Pamela: It’s okay, Doctor.  
Dr. Quinzel: Harleen. Call me Harleen.

Pamela quickly paused.

Pamela: What’s been going on?  
Dr. Quinzel: I’ve just been thinking about you and our conversations. You keep me intrigued, Pamela. I’ve never met someone like you.  
Pamela: I hope that’s a good thing. 

Dr. Quinzel laughed. 

Dr. Quinzel: I meant it that way.   
Pamela: That’s good, then. I don’t come by people I make a positive influence on on a regular basis.  
Dr. Quinzel: You could, if you tried. I think your insanity clouds your judgement most of the time, though.  
Pamela: It’s my biggest downfall after sunlight.  
Dr. Quinzel: It’ll get better when you learn how to cope with it.   
Pamela: I hope. With your help I’ll be invincible.

Dr. Quinzel chuckled.

Dr. Quinzel: I don’t know about all that.  
Pamela: You’re more powerful than you think.

Dr. Quinzel paused.  
Pamela: You got me talking, so there’s something.

Dr. Quinzel chuckled.

Dr. Quinzel: I did, didn’t I?

She paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: Why is that?  
Pamela: What do you mean?  
Dr. Quinzel: How and why did I get you of all people to spill your guts? In the beginning, you were giving me sentences at a time and now...you’re just so...open.

Pamela paused.

Pamela: I thought you were going to be like the others; scared enough to the point you’d eventually just stop coming. I thought my words would drive you away and we could end this faster. No matter what I said, you still tried to break me open. Then you moved me into the sunlight, so I wouldn’t wilt anymore. That was when I realized I could trust you. You accepted me and made me feel safe. My affection towards you grew.

Dr. Quinzel was silent. 

Pamela: I don’t know if you remember, but you asked me if I could find a home in another person.

Pamela paused.

Pamela: I think I have.


	14. Session Fourteen (Friday)

Pamela: Morning, Harleen.  
Dr. Quinzel: Morning, Pamela. How are you?  
Pamela: I’m great. And you?  
Dr. Quinzel: Good. It’s nice to hear you’re doing great.  
Pamela: Three visits from you in a week could make anyone feel great.

Dr. Quinzel chuckled.

Pamela: What’s on the agenda to talk about today?  
Dr. Quinzel: I didn’t have much. Just more insight on you.

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: What is your most treasured memory?

Pamela paused.

Pamela: I’d have to say when my mother took me to a flower festival when I was young. It was free of my father surrounded by something that I loved. It always sticks with me.  
Dr. Quinzel: Is that a memory you go back to often?  
Pamela: Not often enough. I nearly forgot about it.  
Dr. Quinzel: What do you think the reason for that is?  
Pamela: I don’t allow myself to be happy. I don’t let myself enjoy things.  
Dr. Quinzel: Why?

Pamela paused.

Pamela: I-I don’t like to be reminded of how much has changed and what’s different.  
Dr. Quinzel: You haven’t accepted the changes in your life, Pamela?  
Pamela: I haven’t. 

Pamela paused.

Pamela: I’m scared.  
Dr. Quinzel: Of what?  
Pamela: Accepting it, I guess. I never got to come to terms with having my mother gone or getting these new powers. I was always thrusted into something new: all the abuse coming to me and figuring out what my powers were and how to use them. I never got the time or took the time to process it all.  
Dr. Quinzel: Don’t you think you should?  
Pamela: Probably.  
Pamela paused.

Pamela: Where do I even start, though? How do I even do it?

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: This is my advice to you. You cannot get better, until you let go. When you say goodbye to your mother, you can start to come to terms with everything that has happened. You still have her in your heart, but you haven’t given her the time to be free from you.

Pamela was silent for a few moments. 

Pamela: Is it important to get rid of one love to move on to the next?  
Dr. Quiznel: It helps more.  
Pamela: Thank you, Harleen. I know what I need to work on.  
Dr. Quinzel: You’re welcome, Pamela.


	15. Session Fifteen (Monday)

Dr. Quinzel: Morning, Pamela.  
Pamela: Good morning.   
Dr. Quinzel: How was your weekend?  
Pamela: It was okay. 

Pamela paused.

Pamela: I...I ended up communicating with the flowers close enough to my mother’s grave. Not exactly what I planned, but what I could do at the time.  
Dr. Quinzel: That’s great, Pamela. How do you feel?  
Pamela: Warm. A weight was lifted off my chest and was filled into my heart.  
Dr. Quinzel: I love to hear that. I’m glad it worked out for you. I didn’t expect you to move so quickly.  
Pamela: It was something I needed to do. I waited too long.  
Dr. Quinzel: Well, either way I am proud. 

Dr. Quinzel paused.

Dr. Quinzel: What’s next for you, Pamela?

Pamela paused.

Pamela: Accepting the change and what happened to me. Accepting what happened with Jason and forgiving him. This isn’t going to be quick like it was with my mom. There’s a lot to process and a lot of hurt.  
Dr. Quinzel: I understand.  
Pamela: I’m going to need you to be here for me, Harleen.   
Dr. Quinzel: Of course. I’ll never leave your side, Pamela.


	16. Session Sixteen (Wednesday)

Pamela: Is this a usual thing now?  
Dr. Quinzel: It can be, if you would like. I just wanted to check in for a bit to see how you were doing, even if it was for a short while.  
Pamela: It’s okay with me. You can come over and see me whenever you want, Harleen.  
Dr. Quinzel: I might take you up on that offer.

Pamela chuckled. 

Dr. Quinzel: How are you doing?  
Pamela: Okay for now. I just have been thinking about my relationship with Jason and what I want for myself now.  
Dr. Quinzel: A partnership, correct?  
Pamela: Yes, essentially. I want to be able to automatically know the other person doesn’t want to get a one up on me. It’s us helping each other.  
Dr. Quinzel: What’s your plan when you get out of here?   
Pamela: For once, I don’t know. I think it’s best if I rested for a bit. Get my head back on my shoulders.   
Dr. Quinzel: That’s a good idea.

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: Is there a point where you’ll stop seeing me, because I get better?  
Dr. Quinzel: I can keep seeing you, if you would like. The only time I would stop is if you’d ask me to.  
Pamela: I’d never want to stop seeing you, Harleen.  
Dr. Quinzel: I’m glad, Pamela. 

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: Harleen, before you go. Do you have an explanation that might help me with Jason?  
Dr. Quinzel: Regarding?  
Pamela: How he was as a person.

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: He was your professor, correct?  
Pamela: Yes.   
Dr. Quinzel: So, you were still young and your brain was still developing. 

Dr. Quinzel hummed. 

Dr. Quinzel: He was obsessed with his work to the point he’d do anything for it. I think seeing you and having you work with him stroked obsession for him. Due to your age and his possible psychotic tendencies, he was able to seduce you and manipulate you for what he wanted. You were never in the wrong in that situation, Pamela. You were taken advantage of. 

Silence filled the room for a couple of moments. 

Pamela: Thank you, Harleen.   
Dr. Quinzel: Don't blame yourself for something that wasn’t your fault to begin with.


	17. Session Seventeen (Friday)

Pamela: Good morning, Harleen.   
Dr. Harleen: Morning, Pamela. How are you?  
Pamela: I’m okay. There’s a lot I’m still processing in my head about Jason.  
Dr. Harleen: I imagine. Take your time. I am here for you.   
Pamela: Thank you, Harleen.

Dr. Harleen paused. 

Dr. Harleen: Have you ever had friends, Pamela?  
Pamela: Not really. I have always been to myself. It got worse after Jason.  
Dr. Harleen: You’ve fought alone.  
Pamela: I’ve been alone for a while, so I had no choice.  
Dr. Harleen: Have you isolated yourself or have you just actually been alone?

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: After my mother passed, I think I just isolated myself. By college, I was getting back into being more open with people and becoming friends.   
Dr. Harleen: And then you met Jason and you were back to isolation.  
Pamela: Correct.   
Dr. Harleen: Are you going to continue to isolate yourself once you get out of here, Pamela?

Pamela paused.

Pamela: Would it be too much to ask to see you when I’m out?  
Dr. Quinzel: In what way?  
Pamela: What way would you like, Doctor?

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Pamela: You are a doctor first; friend second.  
Dr. Quinzel: I agree, Pamela.   
Pamela: But outside of this is a different story.   
Dr. Quinzel: You are quite the minx, Pamela.

Pamela chuckled.

Pamela: Only around the women I like.


	18. Session Eighteen (Monday)

Pamela: Good to see you again, Harleen.  
Dr. Quinzel: Nice to see you, as well.

Dr. Quinzel paused.

Dr. Quinzel: Anything that’s been on your mind you want to voice?  
Pamela: Not anything appropriate.

Dr. Quinzel chuckled. 

Dr. Quinzel: What am I supposed to do with you?  
Pamela: I guess that’s up to you, Doctor. 

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: Have you always been this flirty?  
Pamela: No. It happened after the powers. I found it in regaining confidence.  
Dr. Quinzel: Is that confidence still there?  
Pamela: For the most part. I have my moments, but for the most part I flirt my way through.  
Dr. Quinzel: Is that a power thing or does it have truthful feelings beneath it?  
Pamela: Depends on the person. 

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: In the case of Batman, it’s for power. When I do it with you, it’s true feelings. 

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: Is that how you show affection?  
Pamela: I guess I do now. I wouldn’t say I have affection for Batman, though.  
Dr. Quinzel: But you haven’t killed him.  
Pamela: He hasn’t outright killed my plants.  
Dr. Quinzel: But he's stopped you from getting the people that do. 

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: My affection for you is different, though. Why is that?

Dr. Quinzel cleared her throat. 

Dr. Quinzel: I believe that you have affection for him, because he is your nemesis. If he’s not there, you can do whatever you want. There’s no thrill for you in that. It’s why you mentally unknowingly feel like you need him. 

Pamela paused. She didn’t say anything for a few moments. 

Pamela: How do you show affection, Doctor?

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: I’m not sure. I never really put thought into it.  
Pamela: I think you show it through your speech.  
Dr. Quinzel: Meaning?  
Pamela: I’m sure you don’t talk to me the same way you talk to other patients.

Dr. Quinzel paused.

Dr. Quinzel: I don’t. I have to assess you all differently.  
Pamela: And your accession of me?

Dr. Quinzel chuckled.

Pamela: I’m just teasing. 

She paused. 

Pamela: But I can just tell from your movements and the things you say to me. It’s sort of like your love language.

Dr. Quinzel paused.

Pamela: I’m guessing your love language is words of affirmation.

Dr. Quinzel paused again before clearing her throat.

Dr. Quinzel: You’d be correct. And yours?  
Pamela: Physical touch.

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: You can see how my current predicament is everything but.

Dr. Quinzel chuckled. She paused.

Dr. Quinzel: How is that for you?  
Pamela: What? My love language or being stuck with it in here?  
Dr. Quinzel: The first part.

Pamela paused. 

Pamela: It’s craving the touch of another. Wanting them to touch you or you to touch them. It’s a longing that never ends. And when you long for them, but can’t touch them, it hurts more. 

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: Do you crave someone now?  
Pamela: It’s hard not to when I see them so often.

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: Have you ever fallen in love properly, Pamela?  
Pamela: Not that I know of. Jason was the last person I loved romantically and that was one sided, which I figured out too late.  
Dr. Quinzel: Would you like to fall in love again?  
Pamela: One might say I already did.

Dr. Quinzel didn’t say anything.

Pamela: Are you in love, Doctor?

Dr. Quinzel took a breath.

Dr. Quinzel: I...I don’t know. I have never fallen like this before.  
Pamela: That is the first sign.

Dr. Quinzel paused. 

Dr. Quinzel: There’s a couple of things I need to figure out, Pamela.  
Pamela: Take your time. I’ll be here waiting for you.

Harleen hit the stop button of her recorder. She sighed and ran her hands over her face.  
“What am I gonna do?” she whispered.  
She paced back and forth in her apartment running through different things in her head: her job, Pamela, and her feelings she was trying to suppress, but continuously showed up.  
The door to Harleen’s apartment slammed open.  
She looked over. “Pamela?!”  
Pamela was standing in the doorway in her orange Arkham jumpsuit. It was ripped and tattered in places that her vines stemmed out of. Her eyes were a bright green, like lasers. She immediately looked at Harley, as her vines shot out towards her.  
“You left!” Pamela cried.  
“Pamela,” Harleen said.  
“YOU LEFT ME! YOU SAID YOU WOULDN’T!”  
Pamela’s vines inches closer to Harleen, as she folded into herself.  
“Pamela,” Harleen repeated, a little louder.  
“YOU SAID YOU WOULDN’T LEAVE ME UNTIL I WAS READY! I WASN’T READY! IT’S BEEN FIVE DAYS!”  
“Pamela! I had to leave!”  
Pamela’s vines wavered. They stopped where they were in the air, inches away from wrapping themselves Harleen.  
Harleen paused before standing up straight. She looked deep into Pamela’s eyes. She walked up to Pamela, slowly. “I had to leave, because I was falling in love with you.” Harleen placed her hand on Pamela’s cheek.  
Pamela closed her eyes, as she leaned into the touch.  
“I didn’t want to go, Pamela,” Harleen continued. “But it wasn’t professional to keep seeing you.”  
The vines floating in the air went down and disappeared. “Harleen.”  
“Yes, Pamela.”  
Pamela opened her eyes. “You could’ve told me.”  
Harleen sighed. She let Pamela go, but Pamela quickly grabbed her around her wrist.  
“I know you didn’t want to threaten your job,” Pamela said.  
“Or you,” Harleen whispered.  
“You’re foolish to think my feelings are not the same as yours.” Pamela paused. “I’m not in Arkham anymore, Harleen.”  
Harleen slightly smiled. “I know.” Harleen paused. “Are you sure it’s safe? Will you be okay?”  
Pamela moved to hold Harleen’s hands. “I’ll be fine. Don’t worry. I’ve been doing this for years.”  
“But you still end up in Arkham.”  
“Don’t worry. I care too much about you to mess this up.” Pamela leaned in close. “I’ll take care of you.”  
Harleen glanced up into Pamela’s eyes before focusing on her lips.  
“I don’t want to mess this up,” Pamela whispered.  
“You won’t,” Harleen whispered back.  
Pamela closed her eyes. “Harleen.”  
“Yes?”  
“May I kiss you?”  
“I was hoping you’d ask.”  
Pamela leaned in and met her lips with Harleen’s. Their lips easily slid over one another, as pent up love bubbled over the surface. Pamela pulled Harleen’s hips to her, as Harleen pulled against Pamela’s jumpsuit. Both of them, afraid to even let air pass between them. The cravings of touching one another finally being fulfilled. Harleen pulled away first, out of breath. The only thing filling the air were unevens breaths coming from the both of them.  
Pamela placed her hands on Harleen’s cheeks. “I refuse to lose you again.”  
Harleen kissed the inside of Pamela’s palm. “You won’t. I promise.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for reading. I'm glad so many enjoyed. There's a second part to the series, which will be out in time. Might write another fanfic in between for a small break. Thank you all. Every kudos means the world to me.
> 
> Edit: If you liked this work, I put out another that's a Poison Ivy/Selina fanfic if you wanna read it


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